Goodbye Letter from George W. Bush to New Christian Men

Dear Mr. Jesus freak,

Feel proud. The morality taught to you through the teachings of Jesus Christ is leading you down a path of many great men before you.

As you proceed down this path you’ll find many of Jesus’ truths to be advantageous to your gender. For instance, its tradition for you wife to be subjugated your will. In other words, Christians of faith are allowed wives that must fully submit their free will to you. Without Jesus’ message to obey, females learn, early in life, that they don’t need men. Through Jesus’ help, most little girls are easily brainwashed into believing that God demands that the only way to feel his love is to submit to that special man that completes them.

Also, as a man you can also freely enjoy the drive to kill. Fighting for Jesus is morally acceptable.

The Christian church also allows you to persecute anyone your pastor hates. Don’t worry about interpreting Jesus’ good word, the Christian church provides a religious leader for just that reason. No longer will you be burdened with the worry about your choices, just look to the church. As an added bonus you can expect to spend your time and money in an effort to punish those that don’t share Jesus’ morality, because if you’re not with Jesus, you’re against him. Remember, only the true believers are saved so it doesn’t matter how you treat the unchosen.

God’s true news: Not once, in the history of the Christian church, has the teachings of Jesus Christ been used to advocate hate. Jesus is about love. The words of Jesus has never been used to subjugate women like every other monotheistic religion. Jesus’ churches has never taught racism or bigotry. History is just one long story describing how religious morality has stopped wars and ended poverty. Why would anyone who believes in God’s love advocate war? The very notion is obviously a lie provided by Satan. Finding Jesus’ love only comes through accepting him as your savior. Without that love it has been the practice of the church to enforce Jesus’ love. It’s not war if its for Jesus; hate becomes love when Jesus is threatened. When has Jesus not been morally correct? Our savior’s morality has never advocated pain and suffering for those that oppose him, just those that won’t accept his love.

Sincerely,

President George W. Bush

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